him in his crib at night has ended. I miss those thankful glances he gave me before he rolled over and went to sleep. Now he arches his back when he sees the crib, throws himself into a full tantrum and as soon as I shut the door, pulls up in the crib and stands there screaming until we go get him. He will only fall asleep with a bottle in his mouth in my or (preferably) Dave's arms. Naps are also a struggle. I just discontinued nursing him to sleep in our bed for naps. He's too mobile to sleep there alone. He often fell asleep for naps in his crib with a bottle (at daycare and at home), but that too has come to an abrupt end.
Calling all parents... do you think any of these contribute to our sleeping problems:
- Transition from formula to cow's milk
- Transition out of daycare
- Transition from back to front car seat (I know - I'm desperate for some kind of reason!)
- Perhaps he's alway overly tired since it is such a struggle for him to fall asleep, so then a vicious cycle continues...
- Some kind of delayed separation anxiety phase?
When he was about 7 months, we let him cry it out a few nights and his sleep has been relatively good since then. WHY the sudden change?! Why, God, why?! I was hoping Dave and I would get to sleep through the night ALONE for at least a few months before H2 comes along in July. Those months are dwindling, as we are half way through the pregnancy already! Oh sweet rest, why do you abandon me?
Yes, I am dramatic. That's my life right now. Between a lack of sleep and pregnancy hormones, all I can do is miss the real me ... Otherwise, things are wonderful!
One thing that brightens my day (to illustrate how deranged I've become): when Haven poops, he grunts and sits in one position until he's done. Then he crawls over to me and climbs on me until I get up and change his diaper. It's pretty cute.
8 comments:
Okay, so here's my two cents worth. And people may disagree...but I figure, I haven't stunted my three kiddos so far.
It could be delayed sep.anx.phase. Every kid goes through it at a different time(s). Regardless of when the books say to expect it.
SO couple that with the fact that your son could have just figured out that he's got a mind of his own and wants to exert said independence/will... Fun times. :)
As long as he doesn't have an ear infection (which my girls would scream bloody murder when they'd see their crib during ear infections. laying down puts more pressure on their ears)...I'd say to let him scream it out. Otherwise, it's just reinforcing habits in him that you don't want to become the norm. Especially since H2 is on the way.
Of course, this is all too easy for me to say when I'm not the one there with him when he's screaming. :(
but I'd encourage you to just try to reestablish the comforting routine-before-bedtime thing. Prepping him mentally. and then let go to sleep. He's put himself to sleep before and as long as he isn't in pain, he can do it again.
And FYI: My girls STILL loved me in the morning! Shocked me after they had to cry it out for for-e-vah...but they did. :D
I have to go with "he's figured out he has a mind of his own and wants his own way".
His is, after all, YOUR son.....
Ahhh good times, good times. Nate started the sleeping issues when I was pregnant with Anika. We tried everything, but ended up with Terry sleeping with him every single night... for several months. He'd go to sleep in his crib--which switched to a bed sometime in there--but then he would wake up in the middle of the night and not stop screaming and crying.
I hope Haven settles back into a routine soon. Poor mama. Poor papa.
(I also remember not feeling like myself at all. It all passes like the seasons. Hang in there, my friend).
oh, jen, how miserable... I know only too well how it feels to be running on empty all the time, but i have never had to do that while pregnant!
our sleep issues are not yet solved, but the main reason for that (I believe) is that the girls cribs are still in our bedroom, and will be (by necessity) until we move. there are soooo many factors that can come into the sleep issue, and as mothers, it is so hard to decide on a course of action, because we feel so responsible... what if I am damaging my child's psyche for ever?
anyway, sleep begets sleep, so if Haven isn't getting good naps, he may not get good night time sleep, either. But the biggest thing I have found is that these little buggers are so stubborn, and they figure out really fast how to get results. so if he is used to getting held when he cries, he probably will scream for a good long time, because he is sure he will get a result eventually. the only thing I have found to reestablish sleep habits is crying it out. which I currently can't do, at least not in the middle of the night, because there are students in the building with us who have to get up at 6am and it stinks! so I am not really one to talk....
if he won't do the bottle anymore, that is a good thing, because if he falls asleep with it, the milk can pool in his mouth, and the sugar can affect his teeth over time... blah, blah, blah, all we want is our kids to sleep and sleep well!!! I found a book helpful, because I like a plan to follow; it makes me feel more confident. I used "healthy sleep habits, happy child" which ruth z. recommended to me. it has every possible sleep problem scenario, all the way through teen years, and a plan of attack "for exhausted parents".
anywhoo, good luck and may God grant you sleep, lots of it, and soon!!!!
I know that he is either teething (I hope!) or more likely, going to have to cry it out. Nobody tells you that if you do it once it's not over! Man, I HATE those looong crying sessions. Especially with these pregnancy hormones - I know I'll be crying it out myself!
I feel so bad for you. Been there. Done that. Welcome to the world of toddlers where they will test your patience and see what they get away with. He is a smart little cookie because he has already figured out that if he keeps it up long enough, you will come get him. Not sure what to tell you to do. The only thing I can say is stick to your guns!!! You are entering a whole new world here and soon he will be playing you against Dave when getting permission. Trust me. Toddler times are fun but challenging!!! Good luck!
I agree with every thing Christin says about this... and I think almost all the other mothering tips I have read from her in the past. She knows what she's talking about. Of course, I guess I say that because she says what I'm thinking and I think I know what I'm talking about too. You do know I'm always right... right? :o)
He's "speaking" his mind. If it's not wanting to go to sleep at 1, it will be not being able to do things because "everyone else is doing it" when he's a teenager. Be loving but firm and consistent with what you do. Maybe try changing his go-to-bed routine, read a Bible story or something calming. Then put him down, say goodnight and brace yourself. This worked for me in years past. Good luck, this too will pass and hopefully before #2 comes along.
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