Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Vacation

Haven slept through most of his first airplane ride. I passed the time wondering how confident I could be that the plane would remain in the air and safely land. What's keeping this thing up here, anyway?


We had a relaxing week of Scrabble and eating and handing Haven off to Grandma at 6am. Here are some the highlights...

Haven met some other new babies ....

I think this is a baby peacock.



Grandpa brought the goat inside.












This was Haven's first experience with the ocean. He loved it...









...but was exausted.




Haven met his one and only cousin Brandon, and his Aunt Karen.

I'll post lots more on our family site....

Monday, August 20, 2007

Bu-bye

Today we leave for sunny, er, warm, er ... Florida. Thanks to Hurricane Dean, we may not realize the sun-bathing days I expected. We might see a lot more cards, Scrabble and (no Lord!) Triopoly than grains of sand. That's okay. We're going to see Dave's parents more than anything. Haven will meet his grandfather for the first time. I know they'll be taken with each other after one glance. Haven will also meet many animals that live on what I'm sure is destined to be called Grandpa's Farm. The collection does not exclude a peacock. It's sure to be a good time.

We spent the weekend in Pennsylvania with our friends Lindsay and Collin and their new puppy, Zuri. I grew up with them and seeing is truly like being home. They are with me in that photo on my right sidebar.

Off we are on our first flight with Haven ... our first vacation with him. I'm so excited. Have a great week!

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Free coffee anyone...

Folgers Gourmet Selections. Get A Free Sample


I usually complain about Folger's brand (it's all they have at work) ... but I thought I might as well try their new flavor. It's free.

Having a great day at home .... that's all for today.

Monday, August 13, 2007

Haven's Friends

Janet: I fixed Connor's name. So sorry. Hayden is sorry too.

Janet, Andy, Andy J and Connor ventured up from Delaware to see us for the weekend. Janet, Andy and I became friends while working at Christian book store in our teens. When we were 19 Janet and I got our first apartment, in which we grew up a little and had a lot of fun. A couple of years later she married Andy and I started dating Dave. With an affinity for computers and us, the guys clicked. We call them our friends, but they are more like family we got to pick.

Haven could not take his eyes off of Connor. When we went to dinner the seven of us packed into their mini-van. Daddies in the front seats. Haven and Connor in the middle bucket seats. Janet, Andy J and I in the way back. Since Haven is still in a rear-facing carseat he could easily see Connor. I have never seen my little guy laugh so hard - he was losing his breath! Connor just had to sit there and look at him and Haven was beside himself. Even when Connor cried when Janet and I jumped out of the car to pick up ice cream, Haven only laughed harder. I tried to upload a video clip, but no luck. You'll have to just imagine the sweetest little laughter. And get the idea from these pictures. The top one is Haven and Andy J (almost 4) and the bottom is Haven and Connor (almost 2).

Janet and I have always been able to laugh together. One time especially sticks out for me. We were both single at the time. We went to Denny's and an older man asked Janet if she just got her hair cut and told her it looked great. She was thrilled. I had actually just gotten my haircut that day. I became indignant and then we disolved into uncontrollable laughter. How sad was it that we wanted this older (read: at least 60) guy to compliment us. Seriously. Maybe you had to be there.

Anyway, I hope our little guys always laugh together. It's good medicine.

Friday, August 10, 2007

The Brotherhood.

I rarely mention my brother. Save for the remark about his farts in the previous entry. That, however, refers to years past. Years when we spent so much time together that I knew what his farts smelled like. It refers to the years we spent making up dramas to Carmen's music in which Darin played the devil and I played God. Years when we were rivals. When I babysat him and he ignored my decrees (and many years before that when I trained him to say "Yes, Master" to everything I said). Perfect years when he was a baby and Jes and I made him laugh by singing and dancing. It isn't like that anymore. I rarely mention him to friends. I sometime even use the past tense when I talk about him.


It's hard to explain something you don't understand. So I won't explain, I'll simply describe.


My Dad and brother became Orthodox Christians several years ago. This was quite a departure from the non-denominational environment in which we were raised. My brother spent a couple of summers at a monastery in New York during high school, and when he graduated, he moved there. That was five years ago. He did not come to my wedding. He has short amounts of time he can spend on the phone or during visits. He has stepped out of our lives except for our brief visits that are like tiny one-way mirrors. We see his life when we squint and make a strong effort; he never sees ours.


He plans to become a Monk. Right now he's what we call an MIT (monk in training) and what he and his brotherhood calls a Novice.


He spends his days building the campus of the monastery, he wakes up and prays from midnight to three am, he rarely showers, he does not look in a mirror, he is learning Greek. He wants to know God better and fulfill his call in life (this, at least, sounds familiar).

Wednesday my sister, Jessica, and I took Haven to meet Uncle Darin for the first time. Women have to wear long skirts, long sleeves and head coverings when they visit. We were stubborn about this for the first couple of years, but have since conceded. So, I pulled the car to the side of the road before we turned into the monastery. After I nursed Haven and changed his diaper, Jes and I shimmied into our outfits reminiscent only of mission trips to Mexico. (Even though we felt very covered, Darin got talked to about Jes's neck line and she had to wear a giant button down shirt on loan from a monk. Serious.)


Here is a picture of us taking a walk - you can see my mission-trip outfit. Darin told me to make sure nobody saw that slit in my skirt. Scandalous!


Every time we've visited in the past, we've asked Darin if we could take his picture. This time, I was adamant in my mind. I was getting a picture of Haven with his uncle if I had to take in on the sly with my camera phone. Before I resorted to such a carnal sin at a monastery, I said, "Who do I have to talk to to take your picture, Darin?" By some miracle, this time he got permission to have his picture taken.


So ... we took the opportunity. I set my camera on auto and had it take multiple shots at a time. I have about 50 pictures from our photo shoot. Dave looked through them quickly and felt like he was there; it was like a cartoon book.


Darin laughed and talked about his life and held Haven. He was our brother, as he always is, but we could not take him with us. He talked about the sincerity he feels about life as a Monk. He said he is not making the decision blindly. He said he is happy.


I miss my brother all the time. Aside from the importance of knowing Jesus, my parents instilled in a deep value for family. Our family had some rough patches and sticking together was often what Jes, Rebecca, Darin and I did best. His stepping out of our lives is more bitter than sweet. I respect him, I love him and I'm proud of him. But most days, more than anything, I miss him.

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Six Months


When I visited Haven at lunch today, an employee at the daycare brought in her 3-week old daughter. Haven sat on my hip with his arm slung over my shoulder as we stared at the tiny face. She told me breastfeeding was torturous, I promised it would get better. She look exhausted, I felt like those first weeks were just moments ago. Her baby yawned, Haven giggled.

I've learned so much about him since he was that small...




Haven is six months old. He loves to see new things, his eyes are constantly wide. When I nurse him, his arm reaches for something to grab--my necklace, my cereal bowl. He curves his fingers around whichever he finds stays like that, arm suspended above him. He can sit up alone for about 25 seconds before he falls forward or to the side. He only rolls over when I do half of it for him (shift his shoulders or hips) and he cries when we leave him on his stomach. When he is happy he kicks his legs up and down in unison. (He must have the best abs under that baby fat.) When he is interested in something his eyes get bigger and his mouth turns into an O. He spits out any vegetable but sweet potatoes and oatmeal gives him gas. As does who-knows-what-else. This child had the stinkiest gas of any I've ever smelled (except maybe my brother's). He sweats intensely in moderately-hot weather. He sounds like a motor when he is uncomfortable. Usually he is content, though. He is not interested in television, except for one time when he had a fever, he watched Babar for about 15 minutes. He loves music and sometimes it sounds like he's humming along. He looks like a china doll when he sleeps. He has a birthmark, like mine, on his forearm, like me. We have the same blood type. He doesn't like the mall but he does like the city. He can hold his bottle. He will put anything in his mouth within arms reach. He will charm you, you don't even have to let him.


Happy half-a-birthday, babycake!

Friday, August 03, 2007

These things take my breath away about...

Dave ( my husband)
1. His optimistic attitude.
2. The way his relationship with God is so integral to who he is.
3. His smile.

Haven (my 6-month old son)
1. His expressive eyebrows.
2. How peaceful he looks with I pick him up (yes! he loves me!).
3. How much he trusts that he will be taken care of by us.

Jes (my sister)
1. Her out-of-control laugh.
2. Her passion for kids who have it tough (she's an esl teacher in Brooklyn).
3. Her commitment to knowing Jesus each and every day.

Rebecca (my sister)
1. Her ability to make anyone feel comfortable.
2. Her work ethic.
3. Her smile (and laugh, but that smile is so indescribable).

Darin (my brother)
1. His sense of humor.
2. His thoughtfulness.
3. How his language skills have developed (this kid could only spell God and Love in 1st grade and now he's learning Greek! just shows what you can do if you want to!).

Mom
1. Her empathy.
2. Her designer eye for home decorating.
3. Her pursuance of Jesus.

Dad
1. His ability to enjoy life in-the-moment.
2. His out-of-control laugh (Jes? is this where you got it?).
3. His willingness to listen to me.

(Listen family, don't get uptight if you didn't get something on your list that somebody else did. It's not Christmas. Take your list and enjoy it.)

One thing that takes your breath away about me:
1. My bossiness.

PS - I also love my in-laws. More about them after our visit later this month.

Thursday, August 02, 2007

Goodness.

What a great day!

It was hot, hot, hot yesterday, but I was just happy to experience it. From the confines of my windowless office, I often have no idea what the weather is throughout the day. I can wear long sleeve shirts in July and knee-length skirts in December because the temperature at work is consistently a nice-but-not-exciting 70 degrees. Yesterday, however, Haven I broke a sweat for a change.

After we met with my internship supervisor, we went to the city to meet my sister, Jes.

Sidenote: "The City" is what people in Jersey call New York. This was weird for me at first, since I grew up near Philadelphia. I once referred to New York as "The City" when speaking to my Pennsylvian-Grandma and she said, "Which city, dear?" It's almost as if people here don't think there are any comprable places in the world, also due the term city. No, it's not almost like that, it's exactly like that.

So, we're in the city. We had lunch at a vegan place and then took the train to Central Park. I spotted all sorts of fabulous strollers. Let's face it, cool clothes aren't what I notice anymore. I asked one woman about her stroller and she named an expensive boutique when I asked where she found it. Ah, yes. Upper Manhattan. Not the place to swap money-saving tips with local moms.

Jes and I talked. This is what I love about time with her. We talk. Usually in circles. Usually accomplishing nothing. But we get it all out and we understand eachother. Haven also adores Jes; she's always been able to make him smile. She pulled the grass out of his mouth when he discovered it in the park, she held him while I ate, she comforted him when he whined.

Dave had a meeting in the city yesterday, which was perfect and unplanned timing. We got to all meet for dinner and then Dave drove home - I love to hand off city driving off to somebody else.

I skipped my evening class, which was a final and brilliant highlight of the day.