Time Capsule

I want to put a time capsule in my brain of right now. I want to remember all of this in years to come. I'm so happy. I don't think I've ever been so happy in my entire life. Except maybe on my honeymoon, which also eminated an I-had-no-idea-I-could-be-so-happy feeling.

I'm stressed too, of course. I have issues I'm trying to work out about myself (so do you, don't deny it). But daily there are moments that I am stunned by all of this magic.

When Haven is at daycare on Tuesdays and Thursdays, I go see him at lunch time. I find him sitting contentedly on the floor with a simple toy in front of him. I stand in front of him and call his name. He looks up and his face illuminates. Magic.

When we are driving in the car on another long drive to see our friends or our family, we finish a long conversation about work or life and Damien Rice comes up on the Ipod and Dave reaches for my hand and our hands fit together like two halves. Magic.

When I sit with my client after many sessions and she cries and talks and nods and takes small steps. She breaths. She says thank you. Magic.

When I ramble to Jesus while I'm driving the car about all of the frustration and confusion in my mind and I know He hears me. Comforts me. Makes sense of me. Magic.

When Danna and I sit in the cafe at Borders with our steaming drinks and emotional chatter and in a matter of moments it disolves to laughter. Magic.

When Jes calls me on her birthday to tell me to turn on the news because she is famous. Her school is reviewed and the children sing its praises and she comes on the screen with a smile and looks strong and happy and revolutionary. Magic.

When I walk home from the bakery with cookies for Dave and Haven is in his stroller and I think about how the house is clean, and I know what I'm going to make for dinner, and I'm mostly caught up on things and I realize that having control of all of that is not happiness, but having people with whom to share love is the ultimate joy. Magic.

This, with millions of other moments, would be my time capsule. I would take it out in years to come, when Haven is older and I am older and life is both simpler and more complex. I would see then, God was right, when He made this world, it was good.